San Lorenzo Valley Animal Rights: Clothes for this effin cold weather- AKA BOOTS & COATS! Volume 1

It's been real damn cold lately. I mean come on, we live in CALIFORNIA, home of anorexic girls in bikinis, traffic, and SUN!

Well, we've got you covered if you're looking for that perfect coat or pair of boots for the winter (or year-round if you just love layering your clothes that much!).

Of course, the cheapest (and greenest!) thing to do is to hit up those thrift stores! When you shop at places like Crossroads Trading (on Pacific Ave. in Santa Cruz), Retro Paradise (also on Pacific Ave.) or even the Goodwill you're not causing new materials to be made for new clothes, AND you'll be one-of-a-kind. I mean it it SUCH A PAIN to see some lowly being wearing the same clothes as you. Especially when you know you look worse than them.

The following items are, of course, going to be free of all animal products, including fur, leather, feathers, wool, and silk. Whoa, what? Yeah, down, wool and silk are SURE AS HELL not cruelty-free items.

What's wrong with down, you ask? Aren't the birds petted nicely so their feathers fall off to fill our vests? NO! "Down is plucked from geese either after slaughter or while they are being raised for meat or foie gras (“fatty liver”), which is produced by force-feeding geese through a funnel until their livers balloon to seven to 12 times their normal size.

Plucking birds causes them considerable pain and distress; one study found that the blood glucose level, an indicator of stress, of geese nearly doubled as they were being plucked."

And aren't the sheep just sheared by a nice, overall-clad farmer? NO! "Shearing sheep involves more than just a haircut. Sheep need the wool that they naturally produce to protect themselves from temperature extremes.

Because shearers are usually paid by volume rather than by the hour, they often work too fast and disregard the animals' welfare. Sheep are routinely punched, kicked, and cut during the shearing process.

Much of the world's wool comes from Australia, where tens of millions of sheep each year undergo a gruesome procedure called mulesing, in which shears are used to cut dinner-plate-sized chunks of skin off the backsides of live animals without anesthetics.

Millions of sheep raised for wool in Australia are shipped to the Middle East and North Africa for slaughter. These animals are placed on extremely crowded, disease-ridden ships with little access to food or water for weeks or even months. During their grueling journeys, they suffer through weather extremes, and temperatures on the ships can exceed 100°F. Many fall ill when they become stuck in feces and are unable to move, and many others are smothered or trampled to death by other sheep.

Intensive sheep farming, especially in Australia, is responsible for the degradation of natural waterways and land habitats and for the emission of greenhouse gases, such as methane, into the atmosphere."

And come on, silk can't be bad; it feels so nice! "Silk is the fiber that silkworms weave to make cocoons. To obtain silk, manufacturers boil worms alive in their cocoons." Oooh, dead worms. So sexy!

So what the hell are us compassionate divas/hustlers supposed to wear?

Men!